Obama, Romney breathlessly await Honey Boo Boo endorsement news

26 Sep

MCINTYRE, Georgia–the presidential campaign went quiet today as both candidates kept their schedules light, awaiting news on whom Alana “Honey Boo Boo” Thompson was planning to endorse. Sources close to the 7-year-old pageant queen say that she has been weighing her options and could make an announcement as early as Thursday.

“There’s no question that Honey Boo Boo’s endorsement has the potential to turn this race upside down,” said Professor Hans Dieterkopf of the University of Michigan. “Obama’s had some good momentum in the polls, but if Romney gets support from Honey, he immediately becomes the front-runner.”

With the first series of Honey Boo Boo’s eponymous show on TLC pulling in more viewers than the 2008 presidential debates, experts agree that her endorsement is the last game-changer left before Election Day, and both campaigns have pulled out all the stops in seeking her approval. Mitt Romney flew personally to McIntyre to present his platform to the Thompson family, while Barack Obama went even further and promised that Joe Biden would never set foot in Georgia again if the Democrats received Honey Boo Boo’s support.

Sources say that Honey Boo Boo was impressed by Romney’s business background and found his choice of Paul Ryan as running mate “refreshing, even daring,” but that she has been disappointed by the lack of specificity in his tax plans, especially around which loopholes he would close to pay for his marginal rate reductions. She gives President Obama credit for a vigorous foreign policy, but is disappointed that he hasn’t been able to make more headway on unemployment, and believes that he has been insufficiently attentive to Congress.

“No one knows what Honey’s going to decide,” said Professor Dieterkopf. “If you’ve seen the show, you’ll know that she keeps her own counsel, and she’s not going to make a decision until she’s ready. And until then, the election is essentially on hold.”

One Response to “Obama, Romney breathlessly await Honey Boo Boo endorsement news”

  1. mundaetraversa September 26, 2012 at 5:38 pm #

    We all know she’ll go for Romney.


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