Obama threatens “really pissy speech” if massacres in Egypt continue

20 Aug

WASHINGTON—taking a forceful response to the ongoing carnage in Egypt, President Obama today warned the military-backed leadership that he was prepared to make a “really pissy speech” if the massacres continued.

“I started with disappointment, then escalated to irritation, and now the continuing bloodshed leaves me no choice but to contemplate sounding really and truly annoyed,” said the President in a speech to the Foreign Policy Association today.

The President clarified that any changes to Egypt’s $1.5 billion aid package were off the table. “Shooting civilians deserves the strongest possible response, short of doing something non-symbolic,” he explained.

The Republican opposition initially classified the massacres as “an outrage” until it was learned that most of the victims were Muslim, at which point the violence was downgraded to “something far away.”

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2 Responses to “Obama threatens “really pissy speech” if massacres in Egypt continue”

  1. PiedType August 20, 2013 at 5:13 pm #

    Your headline elicited a genuine snort and LOL.

    Like

    • twissblog August 22, 2013 at 4:34 pm #

      Thanks–doesn’t get better than that!

      Like

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