Florida sends “crack team” of experts to assist in Afghan election recount

7 Jul

KABUL–with tensions rising here because of a disputed vote count in the Afghan presidential election, both candidates today welcomed the arrival of a “crack team of experts” from the Florida Secretary of State’s office.

The team of twelve experts arrived in Kabul four days late, having accidentally booked tickets to Azerbaijan instead of Afghanistan. They then lost their traveller’s checks, locked themselves in their hotel room, and flushed their credentials down the toilet, before finally arriving here today in a very little car.

“We’re delighted to be here today to assist in the Armenian election,” said delegation head Katherine Harris, who was taking a leave of absence from her job as head of quality assurance at General Motors. When an aide clarified that Harris had meant “Afghan,” she politely declined, noting that it was warm enough in the room.

The two candidates in the election, Ashraf Ghani and Abdullah Abdullah, welcomed the support. “If anyone knows how to conduct a smooth election, it’s Florida,” said Ghani at a rare joint press conference. “We look forward to having the team of experts get started, as soon as we can figure out where they are.”

20140707-164241.jpgA Florida election official preparing for his daily briefing.

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