Trump University settles lawsuits; will start offering PhDs in engineering

19 Nov

NEW YORK–after months of announcing that he would never settle the lawsuits around Trump University, President-Elect Donald Trump announced today that he would, in fact, settle for $25m.

“I’m disappointed not to be able to take our strong case to trial, but I won’t have time as President to fight the lawsuit,” said Trump. “In addition, I don’t want any distractions from our exciting new doctoral program that starts in January.”

Trump said that the university would begin offering PhDs in biomechanical engineering and aerodynamics. “As part of making America great again, we need to double-down on STEM, and Trump University is going to be part of the solution,” he explained.

There was some skepticism from accrediting bodies, who noted that no new faculty were being hired, meaning that the doctoral program would be taught by the former real-estate seminar leaders.

“How hard can it be?” asked Trump. “It’s not rocket science. Except for the aerodynamics one, I mean.”

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: